The Mental Load

Three jobs, two kids and a new career

When I wrote in February about finally making a change after more than 20 years in corporate America, the goal was simple: find something that makes me happier while still giving me flexibility and, of course, a paycheck.

I was bored, unmotivated, burnt out. Honestly, I was just over it.

The truth is, a lot of people I know feel the same way. But walking away is easier said than done. A paycheck may not be everything, but it matters. It mattered to me. It still does. My husband works a lot, and because of that, most of the household responsibilities fall on me. I handle meals, school drop-offs (with the help of our au pair), laundry, bills, scheduling, and all the things no one really sees but that keep a family running. I’m also not someone who sits still, so I know part of this is my own nature. Still, life feels nonstop most days.

Now I’m about two months into this new chapter, and here’s what it looks like: I’m still working part-time at my corporate job, about 20 hours a week. In many ways, that has been a good thing. I took a significant pay cut when I made this change, and having that income has helped ease some of the financial pressure. But I’m also getting to the point where I know it is not sustainable for much longer.

When I left my full-time corporate role, the plan was to work about 15 hours a week for a well-known stager in Connecticut. Tuesday through Friday mornings, that’s what I’m doing: packing and unpacking in a warehouse, going on site visits, staging, destaging. Sometimes that means loading up my car and doing a run before dropoff (as pictured) It’s fast-paced, physical and fun. I always knew it wouldn’t be enough on its own, but I wasn’t sure what the rest would look like.

Then about a month ago, an interior designer I had met a few years ago reached back out. It wasn’t totally out of the blue - I had contacted her when I left my job in January but the timing didn’t work. She wanted to know if I was still looking. She was hiring for an interior design assistant. It felt like a huge opportunity, the chance to learn from someone with an incredible eye and get real experience in the field. I couldn’t say no.

So now my days feel completely unpredictable. I’m still managing the house while juggling three jobs. It’s a lot. Some days it feels like too much. But I also know this season won’t last forever.

Right now, I’m in the messy middle, letting go of the life and identity I had for a long time while trying to make space for something new. Change is hard, especially when you’re carrying the mental load of everyday life alongside it. But I needed this change. And even in the chaos, I feel optimistic. I have to believe that when you make room for something different, new doors eventually open.